I am quite sad because I will not be able to mingle with my co-patients with the best day of our year as patients from our dialysis clinic with our Christmas party which I actually attended twice with two of my parents and then with only me and my father on the second instance last year. Well one of my reason for not attending is that I cannot sit for long during the event as my backbone would be killing me after an hour of sitting on a wheelchair. It is torturous to have my crooked back to stay upright and it feels like a giant clothespin is biting it while waiting for the party to end.
So it doesn't feel like a party for me but rather a sacrificial pain offering so that we can bring home some give-aways like a small sack of rice, grocery items, free EPO, free dialysis session, and a sure bet to win a raffle item which are just basically distributed to patients because nobody can win more than once in the raffles unlike in my former dialysis clinic where I won two items. I also cannot enjoy the parlor games as well and feeling bad that I cannot join because of my mobility issues and also the games are not that fun to do anyway.
My father also front-run me when it is time to eat there telling me, "You said have a difficulty in eating" after bringing on our table his own food and leaving me without anything and then asking me if I want to eat if you can believe it. Shaking my damn head, I already lost my appetite because of it considering that before hand I told him to give me some particular food but he didn't do it but instead brought his own food to eat. You will ask why did he did it, well its my father, he has this weird character and norm which is unique to him and I just have to accept him nonetheless.
That is why if only my father will be with me attending the party, I will not attend anymore but the big reason is that my backbone cannot tolerate sitting for longer than one hour because it will just torture me. Some of my co-patients will be looking for me for sure in attending the party and its sucks because my Mother will not be going there too and that reason alone makes me to lose interest for attending.
But I still am thinking those free stuffs that I will going to miss-out in receiving because you know, free items as always good to receive but the factor such as I had said had a direct cause on why I simply cannot go there anymore especially some friends of my Mother is anticipating that I will attend. I just hope that my co-patients will have a good time today and that the hospital will feed them lots of foods especially the roast pork because of the government insurance benefits that the hospital which is the owner of the dialysis clinic earns per dialysis patient is very big and is a win-win for both the patient and the hospital and so because of that, the sponsor of the party which is the hospital may very well have more budget for the dialysis Christmas party this day of December 15th, 2024.
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